O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree!

Hi. I'm Charles the Bear Cub. You know me. I live on Sparkle Road with my buddy, James. Sparkle Road is next to Sandwich Street. That's in Windsor. I know where Windsor is. It's in O tario and that's in O Canada.

James is really old. He was the second Canadian to get off Noah's Ark, you know. He needs me.

Oh. Wait! Chance lives with us, too. He's a newborn cubby someone left in a basket on our doorstep. He's a wee little thing. He doesn't have any teeth. He just drinks chocolate owls' milk.  I look after Chance, too. Is he ever a handful!

Know what? Chance and me and James are wearing our Christmas toques. We always wear them when we decorate the tree. We put up the Christmas tree every December. We have to put it up so we have somewehre to put presents. I know where Christmas trees come from. they come from Canadian Tire.

Our tree is not too tall and not too small. It's just right. James says our tree is a genuine  60-centimetre Canadian Tire spruce. We hang garlands and pretty, shiny ornaments on the branches. We have a beaver with antlers to hang. Chance licks the ornaments and makes them all sticky. He can't eat ornaments 'cuz they're not in Canada's Food Guide. Chance can be a very silly little cub, sometimes. When it's all finished, our tree is the most beautifulest tree in the world!

We sing special songs when we decorate the tree. We sing Silent Night and Il Est  Ne Le Devin Enfant and O Christmas Tree and lots of other songs, too. Chance is too little to sing but he makes little squeaky noises. That's 'cuz he's happy. We get to eat the Christmas cookies we made. We get to drink the sorel punch we made. I l-o-v-e sorel punch, don't you?

Oh! No! Look at Chance! Chance climbed way high on top of the tree! He's not supposed to do that! I say, "My son! Come down from there this instant!" Of course, he's stuck up there. He's scared and he makes little squawky noises. Good think I'm five and can help him get down.

Chance is such a wee little thing he doesn't know that Santa's job is to sit on top of our tree so he can make a list and check it twice so he can see who's naughty and who's nice.

Cubs who do naughty things get a stocking full of coal on Christmas morning. Cubs who are on their bestest behaviour get yummy things like Smarties and gummy worms.

We put presents under the tree for our loved ones and our friends and our neighbours.

I l-o-v-e Merry Christmas. I can't wait for her to come. Our house will be full of special friends. Merry Christmas will bring Santa and Rudolph the Nasally Challenged Reindeer and the newborn Baby Jesus, the Little Drummer Boy and the angels.

Oh! Wait! I forgot the sheep and the Three Wise Guys who followed the OnStar to our house. We'll have lots of good things to eat and we can go outside and play. I hope we have snow for Christmas. Snowflakes are pretty.

 Oh. Wait! Did you hear that? James is hollering, "Where are my handsome bear cubs? Where are my Sons of Windsor? Where are my Princes of Ontario? That's me! Charles! That's Chance! We're handsome bear cubs. We're Sons of Windsor and Princes of Ontario! We gotta go find James so we can get our ears tickled and our noses kissed.

 This is me, Charles the Bear Cub saying, "Be good citizens. Be on your best behaviour. Be nice to everyone. Then Santa will know that you're nice and not naughty. Nice citizens get to eat Smarties and drink root beer. Oh! Wait! Come over to our house and play with us! It's only 15 days 'til Christmas! We can play and wait for Merry Christmas to come. Okay! Over and out!"

Seven Days 'Til Christmas!

Hi. I'm Charles the Bear Cub. You know me. I live on Sparkle Road with my buddy, James. He's really old. He was the second Canadian to get off Noah's Ark, you know.

 Oh. Wait! Chance lives with us, too. He's a newborn cubby someone left in a basket on our doorstep. He's a wee little thing. I look after Chance, too. He's a handful!

Santa Claus is sitting on top of our Canadian Tire spruce tree. He's up there so he can see who's naughty and nice. Santa has another name, too. Some people call him Father Christmas. I just have one name. Charles. I can spell it. Look. C-h-a-r-l-e-s. It's the same name in French, too. That's good because I might get mixed up if I had a whole bunch of names. What if Santa got mixed up and gave my presents to somebody else? That would be awful!

Chance just has one name but sometimes I call him 'cubby.' That's his nickname. I call him cubby 'cuz he's an, eensy weensy teeny tiny little bear cub. Newborn baby bears are called cubs. Newborn baby cats are called kittens. Newborn baby dogs are called puppies. Newborn baby houses are called trailer homes, you know.

Know what? We're going to have company! In seven days Merry Christmas comes to our house. We're getting ready for her. She's bringing Santa and Mary and Joseph and the baby Jesus and the wise guys who follow the onStar to Windsor and the little drummer boy and the shepherds and the sheep. The sheep have to stay outside on the balcony 'cuz they poo everywhere and don't clean up after themselves. We'll have lots of guests and lots of fun. We can all climb the sugar maple in the back yard and sing Christmas carols and eat Smarties. We get to drink egg nog. That's chicken milk. Chance drinks condensed owls' milk in his bottle. Oh! I can show the baby Jesus my baby pictures!

 Oh. Wait! Did you hear that? James is hollering, "Where are my handsome bear cubs? Where are my Sons of Windsor? Where are my Princes of Ontario? That's me! Charles! That's Chance! We're handsome bear cubs. We're Sons of Windsor and Princes of Ontario! We gotta go find James so we can get our ears tickled and our noses kissed.

 This is me, Charles the Bear Cub saying, "Be good citizens. Be kind to your friends and neighbours. Then you can eat Smarties and drink root beer. Oh! Wait! Santa will bring you presents. Come over to our house and play with us! We can have fun together. Okay! Over and out!"

O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree

Hi. I'm Charles the Bear Cub. You know me. I live on Sparkle Road with my buddy, James. He's really old. He was the second Canadian to get off Noah's Ark, you know.

 Oh. Wait! Chance lives with us, too. He's a newborn cubby someone left in a basket on our doorstep. He's a wee little thing. I look after Chance, too. He's a handful! 

Know what? We got a Christmas tree. It's in the living room by the fireplace. Christmas trees are special, you know. I know where Christmas trees come from. They come from Canadian Tire, Aisle 42. Our tree is nice. We decorated it with shiny bulbs. There's a beaver with antlers, too. James says that's a Canadian ornament. Santa sits on top of the tree. Santa sits on top of the tree so he can see everyone and see who's naughty and nice. That's good 'cuz Chance would try to climb up there if Santa wasn't already there!

We know a song about our Christmas tree. Miss Jackie taught it to us. She's my teacher at the Scruffy Maple Day Care Centre. Wanna know a secret? I think Miss Jackie is a princess. Here's the song.

O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree!
Thou tree most fair and lovely!
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree!
Thou tree most fair and lovely!
The sight of thee at Christmastide
Spreads hope and gladness far and wide
O Christmas tree, O Christmas tree
Thou tree most fair and lovely.

Chance doesn't sing. He's too little. He doesn't even talk, yet. He just makes little squeaky noises when he's happy. He's really happy that it's Christmas. We get to bake gingerbread beings and the house will be full of guests! Merry Christmas is coming and Santa, too. Oh! Wait! The baby Jesus will be here and Mary and Joseph and the shepherds and the wise guys and the little drummer boy. The sheep will have to stay on the balcony. James says they're not very tidy. The little drummer boy will have to be very quiet when Chance and baby Jesus take their naps.

Oh. Wait! Did you hear that? James is hollering, "Where are my handsome bear cubs? Where are my Sons of Windsor? Where are my Princes of Ontario? That's me! Charles! That's Chance! We're handsome bear cubs. We're Sons of Windsor and Princes of Ontario! We gotta go find James so we can get our ears tickled and our noses kissed. 

This is me, Charles the Bear Cub saying, "Be good citizens. Do good deeds for friends and neighbours. Get ready for Merry Christmas. Then you can eat Smarties and drink root beer. Oh! Wait! Come over to our house and play with us! We can pick up trash together! Okay! Over and out!"

284 Days Until Christmas!

Hi. I'm Charles the Bear Cub. You know me. I live on Sparkle Road with my buddy, James. He's forgetful and really old. He was the second Canadian to get off Noah's Ark, you know. James forgot to  buy gummy worms. I had to put Smarties in my porridge this morning. Oh. Wait! Chance lives with us, too. He's a newborn cubby someone left in a basket on our doorstep. He's a wee little thing. I look after Chance, too. He's a handful!

Know what? It's only 284 days until Merry Christmas comes. That's a lot of days! I can count to 100, you know. Last night I had a dream. Chance and me were waiting for Merry Christmas to come. We had our Santa toques on. We were on our best behaviour. We made gingerbread beings for Santa and the Baby Jesus and Merry Christmas.  We closed our eyes and fell asleep. Chance fell asleep on my lap. When we woke up Merry Christmas brought us a present!


I l-o-v-e Merry Christmas!


This is me, Charles the Bear Cub saying, "Be good citizens every day and Merry Christmas and Santa and the Baby Jesus will come to your house. Bye for now! Over and out!"

Merry Christmas is Here!

Hi. I'm Charles the Bear Cub. You know me. I live on Sparkle Road with my buddy, James. He forgets which house we live in. He's really old. I think he must be 20. He was the second Canadian to get off Noah's Ark.  I have to look after him. Oh. Wait! Chance lives with us, too. He's a newborn cubby someone left in a basket on our doorstep. He's a wee little thing.

Know what? When Chance and me woke up yesterday morning it was Merry Christmas! Santa and Merry Christmas and Frosty the Snow Person and Rudolph the Nasally Challenged Reindeer and Mary and Joseph and the Baby Jesus and the flock of shepherds and the the wise guys who followed the OnStar, they were all here and left us presents.

James made us porridge with red and green Christmas-coloured gummy worms. Then we opened our presents. Chance got a space ray gun so he can hunt lions with me! We got green scarves from Auntie SusanJ. We got Smarties and licorice, too. I l-o-v-e Smarties and licorice. They're yummy and that's one of the four food groups in the Canada Food Guide, you know. I got a fire truck and a red helmet. Chance got one, too. James opened our presents to him. We got him  light bulbs and Crazy Glue. We saved up our allowance so we could surprise him. He was sure surprised! He hugged us and kissed our noses and tickled our ears. He said, "You're the best. I love you my Sons of Windsor. I love you, my Princes of Ontario."

Then we went to Rob and Debbie's house. We ate all kinds of good food. Know what? I know a new food. I like devilled eggs. I like them a lot! We had brocollis. I hate brocollis. They're nasty but I was a good cub and ate one. Sure hope Santa saw me do that. We met new friends. We played with Star. She's a puppy. We played with Buffy, too. She's a cat. We played Hide & Seek.

We fell asleep and when we woke up were home and tucked into bed.

Today is Boxing Day. We're going to take some cans of food to the food bank. That's helping others and that makes us good citizens. Good citizens get to eat wallermelons and drink root beer.

This is Chance's first Christmas with us. He likes Christmas. He makes squeaky noises 'cuz he's happy. This is me, Charles the Bear Cub saying, "Merry, merry Christmas! Happy Boxing Day! Happy New Year! Over and out!"

The Christmas Story

Hi. I'm Charles the Bear Cub. You know me. I live on Sparkle Road with my buddy, James. He is very forgetful. He is really old, too. He was the second Canadian to get off Noah's Ark. He must be 20 years old! I have to look after him. Oh. Wait! Chance lives with us, too. He's a newborn cubby someone left in a basket on our doorstep. He's a wee little thing.

Know what? This is us with Wes. He is the big boss at the Dominion House. That's across the street from our house. Wes is nice. He knows how to make deep-fried dill pickles. They're yummy and that's one of the four food groups in the Canada Food Guide. Wes has a Christmas tree. They have good food to eat at the DH.

Look at Chance! He thinks his Santa hat is a sleeping bag!

I'm telling Chance the Christmas Story. Hark! Once upon a midnight clear Mary and Joseph have to go Ottawa and pay taxes. When they get there they couldn't find a TraveLodge so they sleep in a barn. Then Mary had a newborn baby. His name is Baby Jesus. Newborns don't have any teeth, you know. A flock of shepherds come to see the newborn king. Then the three wise guys followed the OnStar right to the barn. They have three birthday presents. They bring gold and frankysence and Mir. I don't know why they brought gold. They can't go shopping cuz all the stores are closed on Christmas Day, you know.  James says frankysence smells good. I know what Mir is. It's dish soap. We get it at Westside Foods. It's in aisle four.

When Jesus grows up he will die on an old rugged cross and save us all from Satan's power, comfort and joy. One day he'll come and get us and take us to his house. Jesus lives in Heaven. Special Ed James says we can't go there on VIA Rail. We will fly. Then we will have Christmas at his house! I hope Jesus will make gingerbread being with us. That is the end of the Christmas story.

Chance is asleep. I'm sleepy.

We put another sticker on the calendar, today. Know what? It's only five more days before Santa and Merry Christmas come to our house!

This is Charles the Bear Cub saying, "Good-bye for now! Pay your taxes so you don't have to go to Ottawa and sleep in a barn. Be good citizens! Over and out!"

I'm Gonna Get You!

Hi. I'm Charles the Bear Cub. You know me. I live on Sparkle Road with my buddy, James. He is forgetful. He forgot what bus takes us home! He's really old, you know. He says he remembers the invention of Saran Wrap! He must be 20 years old!   I have to look after him. Oh. Wait! Chance lives with us, too. He's a newborn cubby someone left in a basket on our doorstep. He's a wee little thing.

Know what? We're playing "I'm Gonna Get You!" It's a fun game. I'm sneak up on Chance from behind. When I catch him I holler, "I'm gonna get you!" Then I tickle his ears and his tummy. Chance makes little squeaky noises when he's happy. Chance thinks that if he closes his eyes he's invisible. He can't see anything with his eyes closed but I can see him. He's not invisible!

Merry Christmas is coming to our house. We can hardly wait. We got a present for Merry Christmas and Santa, too. We made them gingerbread beings. I wanted to make cookies for the baby Jesus but then I remembered he's a newborn and doesn't have any teeth, yet. James says the baby Jesus would rather have a hug than cookies. I can do that. I will give him my biggest, bestest bear hug!

Did you hear that? I hear  James hollering, "Ho! Ho! Ho! Where's my handsome bear cubs? Where are you Sons of Windsor, you Princes of Ontario?" That's me! I'm a handsome bear cub! I'm a Son of Windsor. I'm a Prince of Ontario. Chance is, too! We get our ears tickled and get hugs and we get kisses on the nose. We're going to Story Hour at the Sandwich Library. We get to hear the story of Frosty the Snowman and his friend Rudolph. Rudolph is a reindeer. He has a red nose. James says he is nasally challenged. My nose is black. I'd look funny with a red nose, wouldn't you? This is Charles the Bear Cub saying, "Come over to our house and you can go to the library with us. Okay! "Be good citizens! Santa is watching all of us from Anik Satellite. Good-bye for now! Over and out!"

Merry Christmas is Coming to Our House

Hi. I'm Charles the Bear Cub. You know me. I live on Sparkle Road with my buddy,  James. He is old and forgetful.   I have to look after him. Oh. Wait! Chance lives with us, too. He's a newborn cubby someone left in a basket on our doorstep. He's a wee little thing.

Know what? Merry Christmas is coming. I l-o-v-e Merry Christmas. There's the baby Jesus and the flock of shepherds and the three wise guys and Santa and Rudolph the Nasally-challenged Reindeer, Frosty the Snow Person  and the elves. Elves are smart. I know what elves learn in school. They learn the elf-abet! That is a pun. I'm five. I know what puns are.

We got a lot to do to get ready for Merry Christmas. We put a green sticker on the calendar. There are 25 days until Merry Christmas. That's a long time. Know what?  James and me are gonna make gingerbread cookies to put on our tree. We got lights for the tree, too. Chance can help us make cookies. He can stir. He's the Deputy MiniSTIR of Stirrring.  I hope he doesn't fall in the bowl! He would get all sticky. Chance thinks he's helping by sitting in the microwave oven. That's not helping! Come out of there, my son! We sing Merry Christmas songs while we cook. After we make a whole lot of gingerbread persons then Chance and me are gonna climb the sugar maple and holler 'Ho! Ho! Ho!' and 'Merry Christmas!' to everybody walking down the sidewalk. Oh! Wait! What if we see a lion? I know! We'll holler, "Merry Christmas Mr. Lion!"

This is me, Charles the Bear Cub saying, "Merry Christmas, good citizens! Ho! Ho! Ho! Over and out!"