Hi. I'm Charles the Bear Cub. You know me. I live on Sparkle Road with my buddy, Grandpa James. That's in Olde Sandwich Towne. Olde Sandwich Towne is in Windsor. Everybody knows that Windsor is in O Canada.
Grandpa James is really old. He was the second Canadian to get off Noah's Ark, you know. He's so old he remembers the invention of Saran Wrap!
Oh. Wait! Chance lives with us, too. He's a newborn cubby someone left in a basket on our doorstep. He's a wee little thing. He can't talk. he's so little he doesn't even have any teeth. He just drinks chocolate owls' milk. We get it at Mac's. I look after Chance. He's a handful!
Know what Chance does? He takes off his diaper and climbs way up high on things. Then he can't get down. He makes little squawky noises 'cuz he's afraid. I always say, "My son! Come down from there this instant!" Then I have to help him.
Know what we do? We help Grandpa James cook. He says we're ministers in the Kitchen Cabinet. He says I'm the Mini-stir of Cooking. Chance is the Deputy Mini-stir of Cooking. We get to make yummy food and then we get to eat it! I l-o-v-e to cook. Maybe I will be a chef when I grow up. A chef wouldn't ever be hungry like those starving children in Belgium, you know.
Before we cook, we look in the
Canadian Living Vegetarian cookbook for the right recipe. I know what a recipe is. It's the rules for cooking food. A recipe tells us how to make our favourite foods. I have lots of favourite foods. I l-o-v-e to cook porridge. I l-o-v-e to cook peanut butter and licorice sandwiches, too.
Know what else? I l-o-v-e Smarties. Oh, wait! We don't have to cook Smarties. They come in a box. It's the bestest chocolate ever! We buy Smarties at Mac's Milk around the corner from our house. I know the Smarties rule. We have to eat the red ones last, 'cuz that's what the Smarties song says to do!
Chance and me are looking for a very special recipe. We want to eat pancakes with peanut butter and maple syrup on top. Before we can eat them, we have to make them, you know. They don't make themselves!
Grandpa James calls them flapjacks. They have two names. It doesn't matter which name you call them, they taste yummy just the same and yummy is one of the four food groups in
Canada's Food Guide, you know.
This is how we make pancakes. First Grandpa James gets down the big bowl. It's way up high on the shelf. We're not supposed to climb up there 'cuz we might fall off the counter top and get hurt. If we climb up there, we have to sit on the Time Out Chair and think about what we did.
We measure a cup of all-purpose flour and a cup of whole wheat flour and pour them in the bowl. I know how much a cup is. It's 250 millilitres. It says so on the side of the measuring cup. Miss Jackie taught me that. She's my teacher at the Scruffy Maple Day Care Centre. Then we add a 15 mls of sugar. Then we measure out 7.5 mls of baking powder. After that we put in five mls of Cow Brand. That's baking soda. Baking soda comes from cows, you know.
We stir everything up really really good. I'm very good at stirring. Chance thinks he's helping but he's not. He's too newborn. He just gets flour all over himself but he's happy and having fun. He makes little squeaky noises when he's having a good time. Look at him! He's hiding in the crisper drawer in the fridge! Come out of there this instant! That's not a good place to hide, my son!
Next we put 500 mls of buttermilk in another bowl. Then we pour in 30 mls of canola oil and two eggs. We mix that up real good. Then we pour the liquid on the flour and stir that up, too. That's a lot of stirring, you know!
Then Grandpa James brings out the frying pan. It's black. That's because it's made out of cast iron. James says it belonged to his great grandmother and it's more than 100 years old. That must be really old! I bet Grandpa James is older than that. When the frying pan is hot James pours oil into it. That's so the pancakes don't stick. Then he pours in the batter. I know what batter is. It's newborn baby pancakes.
When the pancakes have little bubbles on top and they're golden brown on the bottom, Grandpa James turns the flapjacks over with the pancake lifter so they can cook on the other side. He's really good at flipping them up in the air and catching them. He says flipping flapjacks should be an Olympic sport.
When the pancakes are ready, we put peanut butter on them. I make smiley faces. Then we pour maple syrup on them. I I l-o-v-e peanut butter, don't you? Sometimes Grandpa James put Smarties in our pancakes. Sometimes he puts pieces of apple. I like apple smiley pancakes.
Before we eat, we say grace. I say, "Thank you God for all the yummy food you make, especially pancakes and maple syrup and butter and peanut butter. I will eat them all up God, 'cuz I'm as hungry as a bear. PS God, please send lots and lots of pancakes to all the starving children in Belgium, okay? Thank you, God. Amen." Amen means the end. I say 'Amen' so God knows I'm done talking to Him. It's what polite bear cubs do.
Then Grandpa James says, 'bon apetit' and we eat the pancakes. I know what 'bon apetit' means. It means, 'Enjoy your food.' It's French. Oh! Sometimes we have French toast. That's another yummy breakfast.
Chance doesn't have any teeth. He just drinks chocolate owls' milk out of his bottle. He licks the syrup off my pancakes and then he is all sticky. Good thing we have a bathtub!
Oh. Wait! Did you hear that? Grandpa James is hollering, "Where are my handsome bear cubs? Where are my Sons of Windsor? Where are my Princes of Ontario? That's me! Charles! That's Chance! We're handsome bear cubs. We're Sons of Windsor and Princes of Ontario!
We gotta go find Grandpa James so we can get our ears tickled and our noses kissed.
This is me, Charles the Bear Cub saying, "Be good citizens. Do good deeds. Be kind to your friends and neighbours. Help make breakfast. Then you can eat pancakes with great big gobs of peanut butter and lots and lots of maple syrup on top.
Oh! Wait! Come over to our house! We can make pancakes together and we can put peanut butter and maple syrup all over them! Okay! Over and out!"
